so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
