Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize