OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
