Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
