Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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