I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
