Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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