If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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