When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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