At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
