Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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