They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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