Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
