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New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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