I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
