Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
