well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
In America we eat man semen.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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