i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
