I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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