So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize
