is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
