he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
