I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
