Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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