Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
