Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
