I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
