My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
