I want to walk on stilts...naked
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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