paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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