Tell her she can't have a vagina
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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