Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
