Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
