This is not my ceiling
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
