Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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