a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize