it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize