help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize