It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
