3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Randomize
