He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize