in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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