he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
