oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
