Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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