sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
