where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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