THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
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Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
