think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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