yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
It's blow job season.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
