so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i would punch a child for taco bell
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
