So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
